Portsmouth’s Worst Pain in the Neck

Recently, at a chiropractor’s waiting room, I ran into Mayor Jim Kalb, Portsmouth’s worst pain in the neck. I asked him if he was in any pain. He said if he could stop me from coming to City Council meetings, maybe neither of us would need to see a chiropractor. I asked him about being subpoenaed by Greenup County to testify about the Indian Head Rock he had stolen from Kentucky. A lady sitting next to me suggested breaking the rock in half, with each state getting half. That might work if Kalb didn’t have rocks in his head. I told him to just give the rock back and quit embarrassing our city. He said defiantly he was going to display the rock in the Marting building after it was turned into city offices. I said that citizens of Portsmouth had already voted by a two to one margin against turning Marting’s into city offices and that he should be trying to get the city’s money back from the Marting Foundation to pay to tear the building down.

Kalb said his blood pressure was rising as a result of talking to me. His voice was also rising, so I asked him to tone it down. He was embarrassing the city not only by stealing a historic rock but also by raising his voice in a public waiting room. Where did he think he was, at a City Council meeting? He moved on to the subject of Ohio’s Sunshine Laws, claiming that my husband Bob was violating those laws by closing his letters to Kalb by saying, “If you have any further questions contact me.” I pointed out that he still does not understand the Sunshine Laws. He still does not understand why he and Clay Johnson and the City Council were ruled by Judge Marshall to have violated the Sunshine Laws when they met in groups of three to hatch the Marting scam. I had to end our conversation, because it was my turn to see the chiropractor. I was glad to get some relief from Portsmouth’s worst pain in the neck.